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Love vs arranged: New truth about marriages revealed!


New Delhi :Gone are the days when most marriages were ‘arranged’ and weddings were more of a transaction rather than a bond of love, with boys’ parents wanting a ‘sushil and sundar bahu’, who would run the house and have babies.

Enter the new age ‘big Indian wedding’ where there is aping of the West. The concept of ‘happily ever after’ mostly exists in fairly tales and rom-coms, says a new book “The Big Indian Wedding: The Ultimate Guide For Dummies”.

The last 30 years have seen astounding advancement in the Indian wedding industry. From home to hotel, roses to cruises, chai to champagne and from big ‘dil’ to big bill- Indians have literally re-invented the entire wedding landscape. The bride is no longer, shy, the groom no longer tense, the book, published by Rupa, says.

The days of ‘Sati-Savitri and abla-naari’ are long gone with girls becoming more confident and feisty. The men, on the other hand, haven’t changed all that much, says author Sakshi Salve.

The boys want to date a rockstar but marry the nun from next door. “The good news is that women are now learning how to successfully deal with this,” the author says.

Salve, who is a single, says the fact is that there has been 100 per cent increase in divorce rates, and the chance of newlyweds staying together for the rest of their lives are slimmer than ever.

Going back decades, most of the wedding work was delegated to family members and close friends who came together to plan, organise and celebrate the special occasion. The current times are a contrast where ‘pujas’ have been replaced by parties.

Just one month before the wedding, the bride and the groom are getting some serious panic attacks. “One would think these are pre-wedding jitters, but that’s not it. The ‘broom’ (bride and groom) is stressing over the ‘sangeet night’ performance. These days dance practice sessions are serious business. Professional choreographers charge anything between Rs 1500 and Rs 3000 per hour, the author says.

Performance mania is not restricted to the youngsters, with quite a few aunties and uncles secretly excited about performing on stage, she says.


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